Jagged Little Pieces
The jagged pieces of my broken heart are beginning to snag at the fabric of my life. I thought I was fine… dealing with everything from last week. But I guess that was not so.
I hate feeling so moody and being grouchy and short-tempered. But that’s all I can come up with right now. Try as I might, it seems I am incapable of being kind and sweet, especially toward those closest to me. I feel agonized, but I don’t like feeling that way, so I divert my attention toward “productive” things and then the heartbreak resurfaces another day, in another way.
This is really a downer, and I’m sorry. I am going to be fine… but right now… well, I’m angry because Roberta struck again at church this morning, and it’s only brought the rest of everything to a head.
Do I stand up and fight? And how would I go about doing that? In a Christian way, I mean.
And still there are so many other problems in the world so much bigger than my own.
March 23, 2008 at 6:34 pm
your words “I hate feeling so moody and being grouchy and short-tempered.”
could be my own.
‘cept, you know what? I sort of get something out of being grouchy and angry and ill tempered. I just can not see just what it is that I am getting out of it right now.
watching too much TV and sleeping fitfully, loathing the workday, but finding no rest on the weekends either. I am sore. I want out.
March 23, 2008 at 11:07 pm
Your first sentence drew a great word picture in my mind and explained exactly how you were feeling. It is a dificult thing to get across to some people that they are not showing the love of Christ to the world. But there is the option of booting her in the backside - in a Christian way, of course.
ec
March 24, 2008 at 10:20 am
refer back to our conversation through my comments and our emails of last week….
Of course - if you REALLY want to get her- look her straight in the eye and say in a demanding voice “GET BEHIND ME SATAN! I DEMAND YOU TO LEAVE ME ALONE. I CAST OUT THE EVIL SPIRITS GRIPPING ROBERTA’S SOUL IN THE NAME OF JESUS CHRIST WHO REIGNS OVER ALL AND HAS AUTHORITY OVER ALL INCLUDING ALL FORMS OF EVIL!” and turn around and walk away.
Bet it would take her a few minutes to figure out what just happened to her!!!
March 29, 2008 at 7:54 pm
Hey Girl,
I just want to encourage you to ride out what youare feeling and just go ahead a “feel” it. Don’t try to be cheerful when you aren’t just “let go and Let God”, I know the old saying, but it is true.
Love,
Christy