June 30, 2008
My Dear Friends
This photo is of a church and community coming together to pray for our friends’ son, Micah. A little over a year ago, Micah had some kind of blood clot to the brain or something like it. He never had any head trauma, it just “happened.” Until late November of 2007, M’s family did not know that he was still intact in his mind… that he wasn’t in a vegetative state.
God is so good, my friends. Look at all these loving, caring people who are trusting in God to continue the Healing He’s begun in Micah!
This video is of my friends, the Mag family, whose son is still completely paralyzed and cannot speak. He can communicate, but it’s a long and arduous process. Please watch it and pray for my dear friends.
Something else amazing: My friend Karol told me this morning that she’s been COMPLETELY delivered from the migraine headaches from which she suffered for 20 years.
Oh, and the Foster Care Home Visit? The woman who was supposed to do the interview THIS WEDNESDAY, emailed today and said she has new duties at work now, and our interview MIGHT happen in the next month. We’re sad but relieved. There’s always MORE to do in the house.
June 29, 2008
Back Together
We’ve had a great night. Our best friends Trina and The Brain were over with their girls. Also ItalianMom and two of her five kids. And my parents. It was a great mix.
I found out today that Cousin Ashton is back with her hubby. I don’t know all of the details, but they are going to try to work on things together. I’m thankful for Ashton, but a little worried that the hubby might do wrong again and have Ashton turning a blind eye to the whole thing because she wants her boys to have a daddy.
In other news, it was a windy day here. Until Rob made us a bonfire. We ate s’mores. ALL of the doorknobs in our home are sticky. I LOVE IT! The three little girls had a hayday here and I adore (seriously) cleaning up after all the fun and frolic.
June 27, 2008
How Can I Keep From Singing?
Long ago, a friend turned me on to Eva Cassidy, a singer whose music was released on CD posthumously. I’d have loved to find a non-annoying version of that to post here, but instead, we’ll see Chris Tomlin’s How Can I Keep From Singing.
I’m putting my Faith, small though it is, in my Creator, Redeemer, and Best Friend. I am choosing to sing, rather than to sink down in the mud and mire that the accusor throws in my way. Here’s a line from the song:
I can sing with my last breath
sing for I know
that I’ll sing with the angels
and the saints around the throne.
A few things:
- I talked with my dear friend Trina, two times last weekend. Something is going on with she and her hubby, but I don’t know if I want to know exactly what. Rob and I love them and their girls dearly and pray for them frequently. Something didn’t sound right in her voice. Some of the things she said didn’t sound right. I worry. I know I shouldn’t, but because of these next three things, I have.
- My darling Cousin Ashton, married to her hubby of nearly 2 years, with sons Charlie and Willie… found out on Tuesday (while at work!) that her hubby and best friend have been unfaithful with each other. Ashton came to see me at work on Tuesday but never said anything about it. Ashton is the girl who was mine and Dotty’s little doll-baby when we were girls. She’s practically our own little girl and I love her so dearly. And my guts were ripped out for sweet Ash.
- My Cousin Al and wife Raelynn (the ones who got Rob and me into becoming Foster Parents), are actually not in the process of adopting their two foster-girls. Because they are deciding whether or not to get a divorce.
- Al’s brother, my cousin Tom and his wife have split up. Tom is living with another girl.
All of that I found out yesterday. It’s as though the evil one has declared absolute war on marriage. And I am so sick of it. I hate change, and I am thankful for Tom’s wife that she’s out from under his tyrrany. But why couldn’t he have been an honorable man like my Rob? Why did Ashton’s husband tell her that he wasn’t in love with her anymore? Why is Raelynn so concerned about money that she gives Al a hard time and makes him want to leave her? Why does The Brain love to spend time playing Role Playing games and little army guys that he forsakes spending time with his family?
None of these things are my business, and I am glad that the Lord has control of the world and not me, because I am fickle and vengeful and quick-tempered. I don’t have infinite love like God does.
So to lighten up things a bit, I will tell you that Rob and I are still rock-solid. A week ago I realized that things might be more difficult for us, because the evil one wants to tear us apart. But I say again, a chord of three strands (Rob, Me, God) will not soon be broken.
June 25, 2008
Phaeton
This is a Phaeton. I guess there’s a VW called a Phaeton now, but the above is the real one. Of couse, I’m still reading Jack and Jill by Louisa May Alcott. I’m almost finished and came across the word “phaeton.” I’m not sure how, but I already knew that it meant “carriage” of sorts. As well as “landau” “barouche” “chaise” “coach” “coupe” “hackney” and ”hansom” all refer to different styles of horse-drawn carriages.
The same as Jesus can be called Emmanuel, Prince of Peace, The Word, The Vine, Holy One of God, Alpha and Omega, Messiah, Redeemer, Light of the World, Savior, Lamb of God, Bread of Life. I Am. All different names for One who created us all in His image.
Nothing I can do will ever make me deserving of His love. But it’s all covered because God’s mercy is greater than His judgment. So He loves me even if I am a dork. Even if I am all freaked out over these changes *coming very soon* in my life. I am still His Daughter, even if I am still limping from my hurt ankle two months ago, and even if I haven’t actually cooked a meal in a month.
I can be a total loser by human standards. And by God’s standards, because of Jesus, I am a total winner.
Isn’t God wonderful?
June 21, 2008
Break-in, Breakfast, Weddings
We’re booked to overflowing this weekend. Rob and I took my parents to breakfast here in Town this morning, but before we left, got a call that Rob’s Church in Middleton was broken into overnight. They broke down the front door, and tried to break into the Safe with a crowbar.
They took money out of the offering plate sitting on the altar (which Rob had placed there a week ago so he wouldn’t misplace it), but nothing else seems to be broken or missing.
It’s sad and I’m sure the long-standing church members are feeling about as violated as I feel. Plus, I think Rob may have to replace the funds in the offering plate: it was $22 for some books for a Bible Study that Rob’s running on Monday nights. He probably shouldn’t have put it there… but we’ve never been up against this before, and didn’t think it possible.
So now we’re done with breakfast, done with shopping and Rob’s making more phone calls about the break-in and repairs. Then this afternoon at 3 and at 5, Rob is performing 2 weddings. The one at 3 is IN the church building. The one at 5 is in a backyard by a pond. I hope to take some pictures.
My mind is actually reeling at the thought of some stupid kids breaking into my church. They had to be stupid kids, else why would they have thought for even a moment that a safe like the ones pictured, could be broken into with a CROWBAR! Come on!
Meanwhile, I am dealing with/giving up to God/moving on from my feelings of anger over the break-in.
Yesterday I was praying and felt impressed on my heart that today the evil one would try to put stumbling blocks in Rob’s and my path, so that we would argue and generally not have a good and happy day. So we took preventative action and pledged to each other and to God that we would take it easy on each other, and not argue. We decided to band together so when trouble strikes, we are two strands instead of one. And with God, we’re three strands.
Ecclesiastes 4:12 (New International Version)
12 Though one may be overpowered,
two can defend themselves.
A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.
June 19, 2008
Loved
I just picked up the mail. Click HERE to find out what was waiting for me.
Yes, Rejoyce sent me that beautiful piece of artwork. She is such a beautiful person, inside and out. And I feel so blessed to know her. And so loved by God that He would bless me with her friendship.
Amazing.
June 18, 2008
Ramping Up
I got an email from our Foster Care Licensing Worker today. She wanted to know when they can do our home visit.
I’m FREAKING out.
Hopefully sometime before July 4.
June 16, 2008
A Little R&R
On Saturday evening, we saw some friends for a bit of shopping, and then to The Olive Garden for dinner. They are R and R, our former pastor and his wife. We have such a grand time together and my heart is still singing because of all the fun we had.
Also, Rob is an amazing husband. He is also an amazing Pastor. After nearly 2 years of experience in being a pastor at a small country church, my husband has turned out to be quite an amazing public speaker.
God is so good to us. He’s blessed us so much. And even though my only day off was Sunday, Rob and I rested all afternoon and goofed around. It was truly a Sabbath.
God is SO GOOD.
June 12, 2008
Red-Headed Stranger
Dear God,
Today it’s been 16 years since Nay-Nay passed away. I didn’t think about it much until about an hour ago when Rob asked me what was wrong. Then I began crying.
Ronnie and Nay-Nay were 11 days older than us. They were twins, too. They had red hair, too. We lived within 4 miles of each other. We did everything together, and yet somehow, it was Nay’s time to go when we were only 19 years old.
It doesn’t usually hurt so much now, and since Ronnie lives so far away, and Dotty lives so far away, most of the time, I feel like Nay-Nay is just somewhere else, too. She’s with You, Father. I knew it then and I know it now, and why does my heart cry out for this friend tonight? Why, when it’s been so long?
So many images from when she passed away are in my mind, but I don’t like to think of the car accident or the funeral, or my parents being away on vacation. I would rather remember being together at 4-H Camp, or singing in the Tree House, or going to each other’s grandma’s house for the afternoon.
It makes my heart happy to think of all the Back-to-School Shopping trips, and sledding parties and sleepovers, dances, riding bikes, making up plays, swimming parties, ramming around at the County Fair, going to each other’s grandma’s funerals, and just ALWAYS being there for each other.
Father God, thank you for reminding me of the good memories. Please be with Ronnie and their mama today, since I know it’s got to be harder for them than anyone else. Give them all peace in their hearts, and pull them close to yours.
In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
June 11, 2008
Rob’s Patient
Rob’s Hospice Patient passed away a couple of days ago. Please pray for Rob. I know it’s hard when your patient dies.
June 10, 2008
Little Beds
Last weekend, Rob put together the bunk beds. We lamented together that our Foster Licensing Worker hasn’t been in contact with us for ever-so-long. And we decided to tackle the HUGE job of putting the kids’ room together and clearing out my yarn and craft things a little at a time.
So. This afternoon Rob and I were talking and decided that we couldn’t be upset until the room was completely together and we still hadn’t heard from Billie, our Case Worker. I checked my email after that, and Billie had sent some more paperwork for us to fill out. And tonight while Rob was at a meeting, I put bedding on the bunks.
It’s such a conglomeration of different types of bedding. I would never in my right mind put those styles and colors together. But it was with such love that the bedding was given to me by my Grandma. And I couldn’t not use it.
Because frankly I don’t have the money to buy new and “stylish” bedding. And I don’t really think little ones would care. Now if we have teenagers, they might complain. I may take a photo tomorrow.
*grin*
June 9, 2008
The Last One
That last post was a very hard one for me to write. I like to write about silly things in my life, but sometimes it’s just hard for me to follow through on something important without losing every single reader.
I know I kept some of you, because you told me how it affected you.
I think I’m a little sensitive because really, The Last Post is what I want my blog to be about. God’s amazing nature of NOT turning away from us.
This was sent to my email today. I so needed to read it.
June 7, 2008
No Shadow of Turning
I was on my knees, cleaning spots off the floor. It was a ho-hum day, and my heart was wanting so badly to come home from work and just CHILL OUT. Sometimes the days are just so long at Work, and I just can’t stand it anymore. Add to that, I have been clingy and on the verge of panic attacks all week long.
- But I heard a message recently, from my friend Joan at Work. She watches TD Jakes almost every morning (we don’t get that channel, but the messages she relays are ALWAYS good) and one day last week she told me about God picking us each out of the bed we made and then lay down in; that we still carry that bed around with us because otherwise we’d be too proud and cocky and arrogant. But the point is, that we say to the evil one, “With the help and strength of Jesus Christ, I WILL NOT LAY BACK DOWN in that bed. I will stand strong against you. Because Jesus is light, and truth, and strength and love. And I don’t have to feel guilty about the sins Jesus washed away, just go on from here, living in the grace of our Father God.”
That’s my paraphrase of the lesson she brought to me. I couldn’t find it on-line or I would have shared it with you. It meant a lot to me, and after a couple of sleepless nights last week, I declared war on the evil one, citing that Jesus is with me always, and that I can do all things through Him who strengthens me. I was mad and not going to take it anymore.
And you know what happens when you declare war. War happens. Literally one day after I got indignant and said I would not lay back down in that bed of lies and panic attacks and sleepless nights and irrational thinking (because I’m over-tired); ONE DAY LATER, I was close to having a panic attack at work. (If you’ve ever had them, you know that the reasons they come on are SO RIDICULOUS that it’s embarrassing to mention. Things just build up and I don’t deal with them because I know my feeling are either not nice, or not appropriate to share in front of Customers.)
I could sleep again. I wasn’t waking up in the night, scared to death. Those things were good and amazing, but then my daytime was being yanked around and I wouldn’t stand for that, either. I thank God mightily for my coworker Joan because she is always giving me words of God’s truth and they come back to me at quite opportune times.
So yesterday, I was on my knees cleaning spots of tar off the floor, when Joan leaned over the counter and began to tell me about the Study she was preparing for her Friday Night Life Group. She cited this scripture:
James 1:17 (NKJV)
Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and comes down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow of turning.
Joan looked through her dictionary, but I went HERE to enter different words to see what comes up.
- Variation – 1. To change the aspect of; to alter in form, appearance, substance, position, or the like; to make different by a partial change; to modify; as, to vary the properties, proportions, or nature of a thing; to vary a posture or an attitude; to vary one’s dress or opinions.
- Shadow – 8. A small degree; a shade. 2. shade or comparative darkness, as in an area.
- Turning – 5. To change the form, quality, aspect, or effect of; to alter; to metamorphose; to convert; to transform. 2. act of changing in practice or custom.
I couldn’t find it online, but Joan also talked about the phrase “shadow of turning” and that she read it refers to the shadow that is cast on an object when a person turns to walk away.
So again, come with me: I’m on my hands and knees, scrubbing tar spots off the floor My heart has been through the wringer this week and I just want to be home. Joan begins talking about the study she did the night before to get ready for Friday Night Life Group. And here’s what she told me:
- With God, there is no change. He’s not capable of changing his Nature. He loves us all and that’s the end of it. He can’t stop, because there is no variation in Him. His own Word says that He loves us, and He cannot contradict Himself.
- There is not even a tiny shade of Him turning His back on us. Even when we feel all alone in the world, God is STILL THERE, still loving us, still rooting for us to come back to Him, and still shining the light of His love RIGHT AT US.
- God will not turn away. God will not turn to the side, turn his back, or anything like it. His will doesn’t change, His Word doesn’t change, His actions do not change. He wanted the same thing for me 10 years ago as he wants for me now: to do His will and live a life that shows others His love!
So I’m on my knees with Joan standing 3 feet away, and the sun is shining on us both. The actual sun was shining through the window when it had been cloudy all morning. Joan was practically glowing and people were milling about but there was nobody asking for our attention. I drank in everything she said, and was simultaneously thanking God for our friendship (which had been on the outs a smidge lately).
God’s power to change me is amazing. But HE will never change. I am still getting chills over 24 hours later at the thought of being fed so full of His word, and it wasn’t even Sunday morning. it wasn’t even at Bible Study. It was through one of my best friends ever. And I sit here humble and amazed at the Good Work he’s begun in me.
In Philippians 1, Paul writes: 3I thank my God every time I remember you. 4In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy 5because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, 6being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.
AMEN!
June 4, 2008
Reach
I’m always reaching for something; I’m tall, nearly 6 feet, and people shorter in stature have no qualms about asking for help.
I wonder if I so adore being the helper, and that is why I dislike asking for help. Hmm. Something to think about.
Since the 3rd grade, I have had a chipped front tooth. (See photo, right.) Rob had to stick the camera in my face this morning before I ever opened my eyes. He said he was going to miss my little chipped tooth.
You can’t really see from this photo, but my top teeth are quite crooked. The dentist fixed me all up (without any shots, thank you!) and I really like it, though my teeth feel all weird in my mouth now.
Rob and I had a really nice day. He “worked” and I lazed around gloriously. We went to Town this evening and met up with my parents for a little grocery shopping and some dinner. It was a low-key kind of day.
After we put away groceries back at home, I practiced piano for an hour, and then we went through bags of bedding that my grandma sent over for our bunk beds. I tried on my new Work Scrubs (so adorable!) and did several loads of laundry.
And now I’m blogging and watching a 3-hour bio pic on Thomas Jefferson. It’s sooo interesting!
Have a great night!
