How do I tell people that I don’t want their pity? I don’t want to come off as snotty or unappreciative. But Rob and I are not pathetic. We aren’t amazing, but we’re not losers either.
How do I tell people that I am not the next best thing? The only reason there’s anything good about me which can be seen by the naked eye is because it’s magnified 1000x through the blood of Jesus Christ.
I have to be honest, I am a little relieved that B isn’t here today for our home visit. And in the same vein of being honest, I have to say it’s also ripped my heart out.
I am a walking paradox.
Add to that seeing friends here in late July, seeing my sis and her bf Lamar in Chicago next weekend. My dad’s retirement party in two days (surprise, of course), and then ACTUALLY having this visit with a social worker who’s trying to trip us up and get us to tell things we actually aren’t keeping from them, but the really have to make sure they are getting the best people for the job.
*huge sigh*
I’ve kept Rob from his work today. I love/hate him working from home. I am not usually home in the middle of the day anymore, but I have a rare day off and I just want to go to the beach, hang out, have fun…. and Rob’s on a conference call.
You know, my life is so blessed. I have to stop being a bawl-baby about things. I’m making up my mind that whenever I feel blue, I am just going to pray for the kids who would live in our home. Because if they’re being taken away from their parents, that means they are living in hellish situations right now.
Please God, strengthen and encourage them. Show them your love and mercy. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
Posted by Carrie on July 3, 2008 at 5:04 pm
You know, when Seth was diagnosed and we were told that we would have to wait to try to get pregnant, and then we were told that we would have to wait to become foster parents, I was REALLY bummed out. I still get that way every now and then. I feel your pain.
The thing that someone told me was that just because it’s not working out in MY timing does not mean that it isn’t working out PERFECTLY in God’s timing. He has a specific child for us. And that child, whether bio or foster/adopted will come to us when it is the perfect time.
It’s such a simple thought, but I forget that when I’m feeling blue about the whole baby situation. So I thought I’d share. Hang in there! I just know that God has exciting things for you guys! I believe that God does not put that maternal instinct in a woman and allow it to develop and then just not give her a baby or child. I’m praying for you guys.
Oh and I’m glad you like my little crocheted cupcake. Isn’t it fun? I saw that pattern and decided I just HAD to make one – or ten!!
Hope you’re having a good day today
Posted by Nettie on July 3, 2008 at 11:33 pm
I hope you got to have some fun today…
Posted by Jen on July 4, 2008 at 12:16 am
Adam lost his job today… so if we’re those friends your seeing in late July I’m not uncertain if that’s going to happen. Will keep you posted though.
hugs
Posted by Jen on July 4, 2008 at 12:16 am
I’m now uncertain…is what I meant